Unknown creatures underground
this is horrifying, and I admit this is proper scary, but this is all I can see
I laughed too hard.
i never understand why non-white characters can’t just be described as fucking brown
they gotta be caramel, mocha, dark chocolatey, cocoa, whatever nonsense
can we start describing white characters with food terms too? “her milk-white arms.” “his light mayonaisse face.” “her hair was the color of dijon mustard.” yeah. sounds about right.
A well known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20 bill. In the room of 200, he asked. “Who would like this $20 bill?”
Hands started going up. He said, “I am going to give this $20 to one of you - but first, let me do this.”
He proceeded to crumple the 20 dollar note up. He then asked. “Who still wants it?” Still the hands were up in the air.
“Well,” he replied, “what if I do this?” He dropped it on the
ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty. “Now, who still wants it?”
Still the hands went into the air.
“My friends, you have all learned a very valuable lesson. No
matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20.
Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless; but no matter what happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value.
Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still
priceless to those who love you. The worth of our lives comes, not in what we do or who we know, but by …WHO WE ARE.
You are special - don’t ever forget it.”
This post always shows up in my life when I need to hear it most.
so who got the 20$??
Flame Princess dropping life lessons while being a badass.
SOMEONE PUT THESE BY THE STAIRS AT MY SCHOOL
you probably put it there
What I learned at camp
- Kids love horns
-kids listen when you put on karkat horns
- leading 20 kids being karkat makes you feel pretty fucking powerful
-leading 20 kids while being karkat is exactly what karkat basically failed at miserably
I just fucking thought of this and i need help cause this is unholy
The GOP has a plan to stop Wendy Davis: blatant voter suppression.
Women don’t like having their bodies policed, and are supporting Davis like no Democrat has been backed before. But Republicans aren’t fighting back on the issues — they’ve pushed through a Voter ID law that blocks the votes of countless Texas women.
Starting this November, Texans must show a photo ID with their up-to-date legal name instead of IDs like a birth certificate. That’s not a problem for single or married men — but it leaves a third of Texas women scrambling in a state with just 81 DMVs in its 254 counties.
The only way the GOP can keep Texas is by rigging the game. Women have the power to turn this state blue for the first time in two decades, but we need to help secure their rights first. Please, join us in calling on the Texas legislature to get rid of this unconstitutional Voter ID lawand stop trying to strip women of their votes.
DANGER! DANGER FOR TEXAS WOMEN!
Republicans = sore losers, scaredy cats and cheaters.
i am kind of sad ok
this cat’s name is Princess Monster Truck
A quick run-down should you ever find yourself trapped in a horror movie and would prefer to live to tell the tale.
1. Don’t have sex.
- Abstinence is key.
2. Don’t go out with people you’ve just met that day.
- I don’t care how good he says his weed is
- he is cuckoo bananas
- and he wants you dead.
3. Don’t go to camp. Especially one where someone was murdered.
- There are six words you should YouTube, should you get the chance
- “Kevin Bacon in Friday the 13th”
4. Find a good hiding place and… STAY. THERE.
- If the killer can’t see you or hear you WHY WOULD YOU MOVE?
- Possibly the easiest rule to follow and, ironically enough, the easiest to break.
5. Always wear sensible shoes, ‘cause you never know when you’ll need to run through the woods.
- Someone will always be barefoot
- Or in heels
- Or just plain clumsy
- And will sprain their ankles
- And die.
6. If the town looks deserted, it’s probably because everyone is dead.
- Don’t walk around looking for people
- House of Wax, anyone?
7. Don’t be a hero.
- Unless you’re name is Harry Fucking Potter, you will die.
- Hell, maybe even then.
- I mean.
8. If you hear something creepy in the distance, like a dog’s yelp cut off mid-bark, don’t investigate.
- The killer is there.
- Also your dog is dead.
9. Always check the backseat before entering your vehicle.
- The last thing you need is to be killed while trying to merge on the expressway.
10. If your car breaks down in front of a dilapidated gas station, don’t ask a sketchy-looking townie for help.
- Some part of your body will wind up in his pick-up truck
11. Don’t go into the basement.
- They are creepy enough without you dying in one.
12. If you’re trying to buy a house and the real estate agent won’t answer any direct questions about either the history of the home or the previous tenants, DO NOT MOVE IN.
- At some point, someone in the house heard voices and cracked.
13. Turn off the television (and run away) if a girl crawls out of it.
- It is obviously your wisest choice.
- SEE ALSO: poltergeist, daughter trapped in tv because of.
14. If the walls of your house bleed, do not attempt an exorcism.
- Move very very far away
- Because there’s blood on your walls.
15. Don’t act like a detective.
- Some crazy Japanese kid who meows like a cat will attack you in a closet.
- If you live, awesome story to tell your friend, right?
- But if you die, it is like the opposite of awesome.
16. Google the location you’ll be vacationing at.
- If more than five reports for “Missing Persons” pops up, you know not to go there.
- Issue. Solved.
17. Don’t get drunk. Or come under the influence of any mind-altering drug.
- Running away from a killer is that much harder when you’re tipsy and giggling.
18. If you see someone in a mask, don’t assume it’s one of your friends playing a trick on you to scare you.
- It is the killer.
- ALSO: laughing while saying, “Tommy, is that you in that stupid mask? Oh, I’m so-o-o-o-o scared!” is not conducive to your surviving.
- Killers are very sensitive about their disguises.
19. Don’t take a shower.
- ONLY APPLIES IF:
- It’s past midnight at the campground you and your sorority sisters are staying at or
- The lock to the door doesn’t work and you hear creepy piano music
AND THE LAST AND MOST IMPORTANT:
20. If the call is coming from inside the house, get out.
- Clearly the killer is not outside, now is he
I love this.
Look, if I ever find myself in what appears to be a horror movie situation, I’m going to don a black tanktop with maximum cleavage, acquire some very badass weapon (a supersoaker full of gasoline and a lighter will do nicely, if I can’t find a chainsaw or something quickly. Machete is also a go. As long as it’s big and ostentatious and preferably loud, explodey, or on fire) and start making horrible one-liner quips before and after everything I do. I will try my level best to drive recklessly in cool looking cars and make shit explode. If I can find a small child who is conveniently mute to carry on my shoulders and protect in a vicious mamabear fashion, all the better.
Because the easiest way to survive a horror movie is to switch genres.
Moniquill has just won the internet, everyone go home.